The Anti-List

There are so many wonderful weight-loss bloggers out there who inspire me daily. One of my favorites is Jack over at Jack Sh*t, Getting Fit  http://jackfit.blogspot.com/. One of things I adore about Jack's blog are his famous lists. They are not only hilarious, but always have a yummy kernel of truth tucked inside each one. It helps to know I'm not alone in this weight loss/fitness quest and Jack reminds me that laughter really is the best medicine!

I was also inspired by Cyndi over at RunRollRepeat http://runrollrepeat.wordpress.com/about/ to write out a list of reasons why I want to lose weight and get healthy. There are so many reasons and I'm going to write out that list, but this first list is going to come from a little different perspective. It's going to be about some painful experiences I went through because I was fat. I don't ever want to forget the pain of being fat because I never, ever want to go back to that place. I'm still fat, don't get me wrong. I still have A LOT of weight to lose, and by no means done yet, but my mindset has changed. I've decided to do it for life this time and I'm not going back.

So here's my Anti-List, so to speak. I should warn you, it's not funny and it's not positive, but it is true.


Ten Horrible Things About Being Fat (that I never want to experience ever again):

1) The bigger I got, the less people saw me. I became invisible to others. I felt sad.

2) I had to take two high blood pressure medications and was at risk for diabetes, stroke and heart attack. I would have left my amazing husband without a wife and my girls without their mother. It wasn't fair to them. I felt scared.

3) I had to have a "special" bridesmaid's dress made for my friend's wedding because I was too fat to wear the dress she chose for me to wear. It looked terrible in the pictures and I felt like I ruined her wedding. I felt embarrassed.

4) I didn't go to my other friend's wedding because I knew everyone from my hometown would be there and I was embarrassed about my weight. My friend and I had been friends since age 4. She was very hurt. I felt guilty.

5) I set a bad example for my girls. I showed them how to turn to food instead of working through their feelings. I felt like a failure.

6) I missed my class reunion, weddings, vacations, outings, parties, business retreats and many, many other social events because I was too fat to participate or to embarrassed to face old friends. I felt like life was passing me by.

7) I avoided certain chairs for fear of breaking them. I felt like a freak.

8) I got winded walking up a flight of stairs. I had been athletic all my life and missed the active girl I used to be. I felt trapped.

9) I was always the fattest girl in the room. I felt ashamed.

10) Food was more important to me than living. I felt lost.


I never want to forget this list, these reasons for never going back. I feel determined.

Thank God, I'll never be this weight again.