Postive Thinking, Gandhi and a Thanksgiving Loss

“Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.”-- Mahatma Gandhi

Wow! This last week has been a whirlwind. I started a new job last Monday and on Thursday I cooked up a storm for Thanksgiving and then my mom came to stay this week for a visit. It's been hectic and wonderful and stressful all at the same time. I guess just life as usual. On the healthy eating and exercise front, despite the holiday and the stress of  starting a new job, I actually got in a couple of good workouts and LOST 2 POUNDS. I stayed on plan perfectly on Thanksgiving and didn't even feel tempted by all the goodies we had in the house. We had three pies, cinnamon rolls, danishes and cookies in the house and I didn't even feel tempted once. There was a time I would have HAD to have some of each and would have OBSESSED about them, knowing they were right out in the kitchen calling my name. This year I didn't even really notice them and I didn't take even a nibble. This change is amazing even to me. What makes this year different from all the other years I dove head first into the holiday season, eating every sugary thing  I could get my hands on? I can't explain it other than this time I've DECIDED to make a change. Like the quote from Gandhi says, I'm keeping my thoughts, behaviors and habits positive. I've made up my mind this time and that has made all the difference.

Last week, I was very fearful that I would fall off my program when I returned to work, but I didn't. I still tracked my calories, ate on plan and got a couple of workouts in. There's a salad bar at my work and so I'm able to eat a very healthy lunch each day, which helps. (I stay away from all the junk in the salad bar and stick to the veggies). So far, so good. In the past, my job was always at the top of my priority list and I was always striving to be the best, even if it meant running my health into the ground. Now, I'm striving to do the best I can, but I'm no longer willing to sacrifice my health and my life for corporate success. I'm striving for balance in all areas of my life. It's interesting,  I'm actually enjoying my work more now, and I'm actually able to balance the multiple responsibilities in my life better now that I'm not a workaholic. I guess I'm starting to learn how to put myself at the top if my own priority list and I'm learning to love myself enough to not sacrifice my life and health for any job, any person, any relationship...anymore.

My goals right now are to continue to work my plan: eating 1300-1500 calories a day, no sugar, no white flour products, no junk food, 8 glasses of water per day and doing my Couch to 5K running program 3 days per week. I'm determined no matter how life may tug or pull at me, I'm going to continue to love myself enough to take care of myself. I know if I continue to stay positive and put my health at the top of my own list, I'll never be this weight again.

Phase 3 Weigh In and Other Life Changing News

I had my Phase 3 weigh-in on Monday and (drum roll please).... I lost another 14 pounds, bringing my grand total to 55 POUNDS! Whoo Hoo! I'm super excited at my progress and really pleased because I actually lost one pound more than my Phase 2 weigh-in!. I think my current exercise plan is staving off the dreaded plateau most people experience around this point.

Currently, I've FINALLY moved past week 2 of the Couch to 5K running program and into Week 3. If I stay on track I will finish the program a week before my first scheduled 5K, which will be the Annual Hangover 5K on January 1st, 2012. What a great way to kick off the new year! I only hope I'll be ready. I can see my progress in my running. I can now run 28 minutes straight, so I'm making progress. A few months ago and 55 pounds heavier, I don't think I could have walked that far on the treadmill without feeling like I was going to die. So, for many people that may not seem like much, but for me, it's another milestone and victory.

In my personal life, things are changing rapidly. My husband is starting graduate school to get his Master's in Teaching and his teaching license. It will take about a year to complete. This means I had to move away from being self-employed and get a salaried position that could pay all the bills. Well, I'm very happy and blessed to say I was offered a very good position and it looks like I'll be back to work full time in Corporate America starting next week.

But, I'm afraid. Being self-employed I was able to exercise and control my eating because I was in control of my schedule and surroundings for the most part. Now, I'm going to have a pretty stressful position and a hectic schedule and I really hope I can continue my weight loss journey the way I have been. I'm very determined not to let this new challenge side-track or de-rail me in any way. I think planning will be key and I've already made a list of foods to have on hand at work so I don't get caught starving with nothing good to eat. Also, the company has a gym and I may try to do my exercise during my lunch hour, in order to relieve stress and keep up on my training.

I'm looking forward to the holidays but don't think I'm going to bake much this year. It's just still too tempting to have sweet treats in the house. I'm looking for healthy, alternative recipes to some of my family's favorite treats and I'll post them here when I find them!

55 pounds gone FOREVER. I'm now in a (loose) size 18 from a 22/24. No matter what challenges I'm facing, I know with the Lord's help I can still reach my weight loss goals. I'll never be this weight again!

Goodbye Size 22! I'm Not Going To Miss You!

 Today I did something I've never done. I threw away my fat clothes. Well, let me re-phrase that. I threw away my really big, fat clothes. I'm still fat, but not as fat as I was. I was wearing a size 22-24 (horror!) and now I'm in a size 18.

I went through my closet today and tried on pretty much everything in it to see what fit and what didn't. My closet is a visual reminder of my battle with food addiction. I have complete wardrobes from sizes 14 to 24. Since my  job is a "professional" one, which requires me to dress up everyday, complete with heels, etc., I have beautiful clothes in each size depending on where I was mentally and emotionally and obviously physically, in my battle with food. So, today I put on clothes I literally haven't been able to wear in years, and I had the most wonderful feelings. It was like Christmas! I tried on one of my most favorite, darling pleated skirts that I haven't been able to wear since I can't remember, and it was like reuniting with an old friend. I can't even tell you how many times I did my happy dance today in my underwear as I changed from one out fit to the next!

Finally, when I had separated out all the too big outfits I put them back in the closet in their "section" all grouped together. I realized I needed more hangers to get everything organized properly. Then a thought came to my mind and heart. I didn't need more hangers, I just needed to get rid of all of the size 22/24 clothes hanging in my closet. Why was I keeping them? The ONLY reason I would be keeping them is in case I would ever need them again. If I am never going back to that weight, if I've made a change for life. why in the world did I need to keep those size 22/24 clothes at all?
I didn't.
So, I took them all out of my closet and put them in a garbage bag.
I threw them away. All of them. Every skirt, blouse, dress, pant and jacket. Gone. Forever.
Good bye size 22/24! I'm not going to miss you!
Thank God I'm not going back. Thank God I will never, ever be a size 22/24!!!
Thank God I will never be this weight again!

P.S. I decided to donate the clothes to charity instead of throwing them out. But they are gone none the less! :-)

FAQ's

This post is inspired by Mama Kat's Pretty Much World Famous Writer's Workshop. Thanks for the inspiration Mama Kat!

FAQ's- Frequently Asked Questions (about my weight loss, diet and exercise program):

1) How much weight have you lost and when did you start your weight loss journey?

To date, I have lost 53 pounds. I started my weight loss journey officially on July 12, 2011, when I'd finally decided I was sick and tired of being fat and unhealthy and walked into a Prism Weight Loss Support group. I truly believe I have made a life change and will never be this weight again.

2) How much weight do you want to lose?

My initial goal was to lose 100 pounds. When I get there, if I feel like I want/need to, I'll keep going. When I hit 100 pounds lost, I may try for another 50, but right now, I'm focused on losing the next 47 pounds.

3) What do you eat on the Prism program?

I can eat fresh fruits and veggies, meat, eggs, dairy products, grains and legumes. The program doesn't allow sugar, junk foods, cookies, candy, cake, chips or fried foods. Basically, it weans you off all the junk and helps you to make healthier food choices.

4) How many calories do you eat each day?

1300-1500 per day and I track every bite I take and every calorie consumed in a food journal, which I turn in to my Group Leader for accountability. The tracking and accountability have been KEY for me.

5) What about exercise?

Initially the program doesn't force you into a strict exercise routine. But, as you go along and get more accustomed to the program, daily exercise, drinking 8 glasses of water each day and proper rest are all important parts of the program. I am currently training for my first 5K race, so I'm following the Couch to 5K running program. I walk/jog on the treadmill at least 3 days a week.

6) Have you always had a weight problem?

No. I was a skinny child and an athlete in high school. I was a lifeguard in college and spent most of my early 20's in a bathing suit for work. I only started gaining weight when I got my first "professional" job after graduating from college. 

7) How in the world did you gain 100 pounds?

I chose to eat my feelings and stress, instead of coping with it. I'm a food addict and an emotional eater. I'm finally figuring out how to be honest about my feelings instead of stuffing my face. As we say in the Prism program, like a caterpillar transforming into a butterfly, I am transforming into the True Me.

8) What is your favorite food right now?

Scrambled eggs and salsa wrapped in a corn tortilla. Delish!

Halloween Didn't Scare Me

For the first time in my life, I didn't eat ANY candy on Halloween. Not one mini Snickers, not one mini package of Malt Balls, not even one little, teeny, tiny Tootsie roll.

Zip.
Nada.
Zilch.
Zero.

I went to my daughter's Harvest Party at school where I was literally surrounded by candy and cupcakes and guess what...

I didn't even want any.

I didn't lament over my lack of sweets and sugary treats. I didn't fuss for a cupcake. I didn't pine for just a little taste of Halloween yummy-ness. Nope. I wasn't even the slightest bit tempted.

I didn't even want any.

I guess I really have decided this time. I guess I really have finally made up my mind to make a permanent life change. I'm really doing this. I'm finally in control.

No matter what holiday temptations I may face, this proved to me I can handle it.

I'm finally in control. Finally!

I'll never be this weight again.